Creating Momentum for Lasting Change and How I took a Chance on Myself

Think of something that you have wanted to do, but have not take action on. What was it that help you back? 

What held you back is your story. This is something that you have been telling yourself to keep yourself safe. Your subconscious mind learned at one point in your life by doing this, it was the right thing to do, but not it is time to tell it Thank you, but I am going to be OK! 

So what next? How do you step into the unknown and actually not fall back into what is safe? When I say safe, it does not mean you have to like it, but it is familiar. 

Find your why  

What is it that is going to drive you? You can choose to work towards something if what you are working towards is strong enough, but many times to get yourself moving working away from something keeps things going.

Let me share with you my story as an example.

If you have been following me for a while, you know that I was working in collection law for nearly 15 years. This is probably one of the most difficult environments to explain. It was extremely tough on my state of mind, as it was a verbally abusive environment. Not only the phone calls but the work environment itself. 

Being an empath, I took on the energy around me and it left me depleted and emotionally torn. Why did I stay? If you caught yesterdays video (ADD LINK) I stayed because of the money. I was afraid to leave because I was making over 100k. No college degree, and owner when I talked with them reinforced to me if you leave you are not going to make this money anywhere else. 

So this solidified my lack of belief that I would be ok anywhere else.

Until I would up in the emergency room on a Thursday morning before work. I thought I was having a heart attack. It was one of the scariest things I ever felt. My chest was tight, my legs felt weak, and I could barely walk. I used to have panic attacks as a teen and in my early 20’s, but this felt different. After spending the day in the ER, they admitted me for testing.

I spent the weekend in the hospital and was released that Monday.

You see, the day before I had a terrible day at work, and the new VP who was an absolute narcissist was at the part of his cycle where he was focused on devaluing me. The problem is that he was threatened by my knowledge, and I had far more experience and was deemed as an expert in my field. He did everything possible to try and break me from the day he was hired, including falsifying my review.

This day was the worst, I spent four hours in his office being berated by him with false accusations and had gone as far as bringing in my staff one by one, to put them on the spot (while I was already in hysterics)

See the thing is, I have never been one to deal with confrontation well. I grew up with an abusive father, and it is something that has left an imprint on my soul. I can handle criticism. We can all learn and grow from it, but noone should be in an environment where their employees and peers are permitted to conduct themselves in such a manner.

I never understood the term “good ole boys” or the “ole boys club” until I worked there. It was a male-dominated office, and they certainly made it known. The level of abuse I endured at this office, I would not wish on anyone. I have had a stapler thrown at me, an employee punched the wall right next to my head (for a visual I am 5’4 and he was about 6’4)

So, you get the picture.

While I was sitting in the hospital bed, it was the first time I felt peace since I had relocated for this job. I knew that I could not go back. I had enough savings to get by for a few months, but in that hospital bed, it was the strongest I ever felt and most committed I have ever been to myself and my future.

Looking back, I wish I did not wait as long as I did, but I believe I had not yet learned my lesson. We all grow from what we experience, and it makes us stronger. I am resilient and have always been a survivor. People often tell me they admire me for my commitment to move forward and do better, I have to agree.

This is when I decided to take a chance. I literally packed up everything I had and moved into my dream condo on the beach. I did not even start my business yet, but I knew that I had to make it work. I moved to the island of Rockaway Beach in NY. If you are familiar, it is really not designed for commuters, and THAT was my blessing.

It motivated me! Each morning, when I wanted to sleep in, I knew I had to focus, get out of bed and “Make that Money” or I would be back at an office, and that was not what I wanted. So, I made the vision SO vivid.

I thought about the commute, how terrible it would be from there. At least an hour, in rush hour traffic - if I was lucky.  The tools, the traffic, and forget the subway.

I thought about the office environment, and the type of job I would need to take on to make the same salary, (would I even make the same salary) ???

The environment, the quotas, the people,
The money I wasted on my education.
My unfulfilled dream
My deep desire to serve and help others see what it is possible, and to help women to shine

None of this will happen if I just give up, so each morning I reflected on this story.

You see, people think it is easy working from home. "Oh, you have it so easy" I hear it all the time. Sure, I do not have to commute in snow anymore - thank goodness.

It takes discipline to get your work done. It takes focus to not escape to the beach across the street.It takes a deep practice of self-balance to not get so immersed in what I am doing, that I forget about my fiance.

I worked through the life balance, I stayed focused on what I was working towards, and I had a clear vision of what I was not going to do again. 

These 3 things are KEY in creating momentum for lasting change. 

Do you want help working this through? Let's talk!
Email me: Amanda@empowerlifecoach.com